Healing Fears (Smokey Mountain Book 3) Read online

  “You want to go where?” Paul asked, certain he’d misheard her. The woman constantly knocked him off balance.

  “Caged. That BDSM club that just opened up. Penny thought it would be fun.”

  “What the hell for?”

  “She’s curious about things. Look,” Elisa rolled on top of him so they were eye to eye. “She’s going to go whether I tag along or not. Do you really want to explain to Mike why you let his baby sister go to a seedy sex club by herself?”

  Her arrow hit its mark, much to his aggravation. “Fine. But I’m coming with you.”

  She sighed, but he had a feeling it was more for form than actual aggravation. “Is that really necessary?”

  He lifted his hands to her ass and squeezed tightly. “It is if you want to sit comfortably ever again.”

  Lust, raw and unbridled, filled her eyes. “Oh yeah? You don’t scare me, old man.”

  If there was one thing he couldn’t resist, it was a challenge. Holding her in place with one arm, he lifted the other to pepper her bottom with hard, stinging swats until she was squirming and promising to be good. Satisfied she’d been appropriately reminded of her place, he lifted her so she was straddling him.

  She was his miracle. This feisty, loving, smart woman wanted to spend her life with him and it humbled him more than she knew. He never could seem to find exactly the right words to give her, so he could only hope she heard all the things he left unspoken. “Are you going to be a good girl?”

  “Yes, sir,” she was so obviously holding back a grin, and he fell in love with her all over again in that moment.

  “Good. Let me know when, and we’ll make plans to go. Do I need to tell you what will happen if you try to go around me on this?”

  “No, sir.” Her cheeks flushed pink, as they always did when she so much as thought about being punished.

  “I didn’t think so. You can still have fun with me there, little bird.” And with him there, he’d be able to make sure they stayed safe. God only knew what might happen to two relatively innocent, beautiful women at a place like that.

  Elisa looked around the club, her eyes wide. She wasn’t sure what she’d been expecting, but what she saw in front of her went above and beyond anything her mind could have imagined. There was a thin man, strapped to some kind of cross while a woman turned his ass red with a large, wicked looking paddle. Elisa ducked under Paul’s arm, pressing herself against him as a burly man brushed by them. She was suddenly grateful that he’d insisted on coming with them.

  Penny was obviously having the time of her life. Drink in hand, she wandered the club, watching as the different scenes unfolded around them. One in particular seemed to catch her eye, and she stopped to watch. The man was tall, pale with a shock of dark hair neatly swept back from his face. Standing with her bestie, Elisa watched as he snapped a thick, wide strip of leather against the reddened bottom of the woman he had strapped to a bench of some sort. The woman’s head flew back, her mouth opening into a wide, but silent ‘O’ as a new welt bloomed.

  When they were finished, the man released the woman and pulled her close for a moment to whisper something in her ear before turning away. His eyes locked immediately on Penny and he walked over to them, a small, openly appreciative smile on his face.

  “Hello.” His voice was oddly soft, but Elisa heard the implicit authority beneath the smooth cadence. “I’m Franklin. And you are?”

  “Penny.” Elisa raised an eyebrow at the breathy, deferential tone of her friend’s voice. This wasn’t the bold, brazen Penny she’d known since childhood. It was like watching a completely different person who just happened to look like Penny.

  “I hope you won’t find me too bold if I tell you that you are the loveliest creature I have ever laid eyes on,” Franklin said, lifting one of Penny’s hands—a hand she hadn’t offered, Elisa noted —to his lips.

  Penny’s cheeks flushed red, something Elisa hadn’t seen in years. Penny wasn’t exactly the blushing type. “Not too bold at all.”

  Paul cleared his throat loudly, drawing the attention of the newcomer and a glare from Penny. He held out his hand, and the other man accepted the handshake with obvious reluctance. “Paul. And she’s with us.”

  “Goddammit, Paul,” Penny whispered loudly.

  Franklin raised a dark eyebrow in a show of surprise. “My apologies,” he said, his voice dripping with condescension. “I didn’t see a collar, so I just assumed.”

  Penny rolled her eyes. “Because I’m not with him. He’s my older brother’s best friend, and he insisted on tagging along. Ignore him.”

  “In that case,” Franklin offered his arm, and Penny slipped her own through the crook of his elbow, “I’d love to buy you a drink.”

  “Let’s keep an eye on her,” Paul said, prompting Elisa to roll her eyes.

  “She’s not the first woman to hook up with a guy at a club, Paul. She’ll be fine.”

  Paul slipped his arms around her waist, bending down to whisper in her ear. “Roll those eyes at me again, little bird, and everyone in this club will get to see you with lines on your bottom. Understand?”

  “Yes, sir.” The threat left her breathless, and weak in the knees. She’d never considered herself much of an exhibitionist, but now that he’d said it, the idea filled her with excitement. But not quite enough excitement for her to risk a session with a cane.

  So they spent the rest of the evening observing Penny and her new admirer from afar. It was nearly one before Penny excused herself and approached them. “Hey guys. Franklin’s going to drive me home. I’ll see you guys at the cookout this weekend.”

  “No.”

  “Excuse me? You’re not the boss of me, Paul Davenport,” Penny said with a sneer.

  “Your brother will kill me if I let you leave with some strange man. Don’t be an idiot, Penelope.” Elisa heard the rare temper boiling beneath the words and stepped in.

  “Why don’t we all go out for coffee or something?” she suggested. “And then we can take you home from there.”

  Penny rolled her eyes. “Elisa, sweetie. You know I love you, but you’re not my type. I’m not looking for coffee, if you know what I mean,” she added with a wink.

  “We’re leaving,” Paul announced, grabbing Penny by the arm and hauling her toward the door. Penny twisted her arm and jerked it away, just like they’d taught them in the self-defense class Elisa had dragged her to a few months earlier.

  “Get it through your thick, fucking skull, Paul. I’m a grown ass woman and I decide where I go and with whom. I’ll see you around, asshole.” With that, she turned and flounced away.

  Paul took a step to follow her, but Elisa stopped him with a hand on his arm. “She’s right, Paul. She’s a big girl. Can we just go home?”

  “I swear if he hurts her, I’ll…”

  “I know.” Elisa said soothingly. “I’m sure she’ll be fine, but I’ll call her first thing in the morning to check on her. Okay?”

  She could tell it cost him, but he nodded his head sharply and they left the club.

  Elisa called Penny the second she woke up, breathing a sigh of relief when her friend answered sleepily.

  “Christ on a crutch, Elisa. It’s seven in the goddamn morning. What do you want?”

  “To make sure you’re not chained in some maniac’s basement, dumbass. Are you okay?”

  Penny’s aggravated sigh came through loud and clear. “I’m fine. Well, a little sore but in a good way. Please stop worrying about me.”

  “I promised Paul I’d call. But if you say you’re fine, I believe you. Just… be careful.”

  “Yes, mama. Can I go back to bed now?”

  “Depends. Are you alone?”

  Penny’s long, loud laugh broke up the tension and Elisa found herself grinning into the phone. “Bye, Elisa. Love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  “Was that Penny? Is she okay?” Paul’s worried voice had her turning to face him.

  She step
ped to him and wrapped her arms around his middle. “She’s fine. He slept over and she’s not dead. You can stop worrying.”

  Paul frowned and shook his head. “There was something about the guy that really bugged me. Hopefully it’s a one-time thing.”

  “Penny’s a smart girl. Just trust that she knows what she’s about.”

  “I trust her. I don’t trust him.”

  Chapter 10

  Elisa stared at Penny, her jaw practically on the floor, certain she couldn’t have heard what she’d just heard. “Run this by me again?”

  “I’m moving in with Franklin,” Penny repeated, her eyes dancing with excitement.

  “Penny. Darling, sweet, completely bat-shit-crazy Penny. You cannot move in with a man you’ve known less than a month.”

  Penny rolled her eyes, and for the first time Elisa understood why it drove Paul so crazy. “Of course I can. I’m in love with him, Elisa. Why should I wait?”

  “Because you’ve only known him for a month! What if he, I don’t know, chews with his mouth open and leaves the toilet seat up?”

  “We’ll have time to work through all of that. Look, it just makes sense. Living with my parents is driving me bonkers, and I need space to work on my photography. He has a second bedroom in his apartment he said I can convert into a studio. It’s perfect.”

  “Penny.” A million thoughts raced through Elisa’s mind, and she struggled to find one she could articulate without alienating her best friend. “I just… I wish you’d take it slow. If you really want to move out, why don’t you move in with us? We have a second bedroom you’re welcome to.”

  “I can’t ask you to do that. Besides, this is what I want. I’m happy, Elisa. Why can’t you just be happy for me?” she asked with a pout.

  Elisa forced a smile. “Of course I’m happy for you. I guess living with Paul is rubbing off on me.”

  Penny laughed and shook her head. “Don’t let him rub off too much. I need my partner in crime. Anyway,” Penny plowed ahead before Elisa could respond, “I have to meet Franklin at the store to pick out some things for the apartment. Isn’t he so thoughtful?”

  “Yeah. Have fun.”

  “I will!” Penny bounced out of her seat and planted a loud kiss on Elisa’s cheek before strolling out of the coffee shop. Elisa watched her go, doing her best to shake off the nagging feeling that something was about to go horribly wrong.

  For the first few months, everything seemed great and even Paul seemed more relaxed about Penny’s new living situation. Penny was over the moon happy, and Elisa figured they’d both been overreacting.

  Until Penny called to say she wouldn’t be going out for their monthly Girls’ Night. “What? Why not?” Elisa asked, miffed at the last minute change of plans.

  “I just… I can’t. Sorry, hon.”

  “Well, shit. What about next week?”

  “I’ll, um, I’ll call you. Gotta go. Bye.”

  Elisa scowled at the now silent phone in her hand. Her wedding was two months away, and they’d been using their girls’ nights to shore up the details. Stomping into the living room, she flopped down on the couch beside Paul.

  “Something wrong?” he asked, draping an arm around her shoulders.

  “Penny canceled. And she’s being super evasive about rescheduling.”

  “Plans change, little bird. You guys can go out another day.”

  Aggravated that he didn’t seem to understand, she huffed out a breath. “That’s not the fucking point.” As soon as the words were out, she slapped a hand over her mouth. Paul had cracked down on her swearing, hard, after she’d moved in. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that.”

  But it was too little, too late. Without preamble, he yanked her over his lap and gave her a dozen solid swats that had her bottom burning under her running shorts.

  “What did I tell you would happen the next time you swore at me, Elisa Marie?”

  “Paul,” she whined. “Please don’t!”

  “Too late, young lady. I’ll meet you in the bathroom.” He gave her one last stinging swat before letting her up.

  Pouting, Elisa climbed off his lap and trudged to the bathroom. She should have known Paul would keep his promise about washing her mouth out. Closing the toilet lid, she sat down and crossed her arms as she waited. Paul walked in a few minutes later, holding an unopened bar of soap.

  “Why are you about to get your mouth washed out, young lady?” he asked as he unwrapped the soap.

  Man, he was pissed. He so rarely was that she almost missed it under the calm demeanor. “I swore at you. I’m really sorry, Paul. You don’t need to do this.”

  “I wish that was true. Open up.”

  “I don’t want to.”

  “I know. This isn’t about what you want though, is it?”

  Tears in her eyes, she parted her trembling lips, waiting like a baby bird as he wet the bar before shoving it in her mouth. The bitter taste flooded her mouth and she immediately tried to spit it out.

  “Bite down.”

  She balked at the order, looking up at him and silently begging him for mercy. But there was, as always, none to be had. So she bit into the soap, gagging at the acrid taste burning her tongue.

  Paul pulled his phone out of his pocket and set an alarm. He set the phone down on the counter so she could watch the seconds count down. Five minutes seemed like eternity with that damn soap in her mouth. As she watched the time tick away, she thought about why she was sitting there with her mouth tasting like she’d inhaled shampoo. She’d been angry with Penny, but it was no reason to take her feelings out on Paul. She knew how he felt about her swearing, but she’d ignored his feelings because her own had been hurt.

  When it was over, there were tears silently slipping down her cheeks. She felt horrible about what she’d said, and she just wanted him to hold her. Paul filled a small cup with water before pulling the soap out of her mouth.

  “You can rinse with this, and nothing else for one hour,” he said, handing her the cup.

  Taking the cup, she filled her mouth with water, swishing it around before spitting into the sink. To her horror, it did little to dispel the awful taste the soap had left behind. She was able to rinse twice more with the water left in the cup. When she’d finished, she turned to Paul who gripped her chin in his hand, forcing her to look up at him.

  “Next time, I’ll paddle your bottom with the bath brush while you have the soap in your mouth. Understood?”

  “Yes, sir,” she replied meekly.

  “Good girl. Come here, baby.” He pulled her to him, and she wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest.

  “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

  “I know, little bird. Now tell me what’s wrong with you and Penny.”

  “I don’t know. It’s not like her to cancel our night out.”

  Paul squeezed her more tightly to him. “You both have a lot going on right now. You’re planning a wedding, which she’s photographing, and she’s still in the throes of a new relationship. You guys will work things out.”

  Elisa tilted her head back, raising an eyebrow at him. “The throes of a new relationship?”

  Grinning, he reached down and swatted her playfully. “Yes, brat, the throes. You know what I mean. She still loves you. You guys have been inseparable since before you could talk.”

  “Yeah. I guess you’re right.”

  Despite Paul’s assurances, Elisa couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something was really wrong with Penny. So Saturday morning, she told Paul she was going for a run, and she drove to Penny and Franklin’s apartment. When she knocked, Penny opened the door, her smile quickly fading along with the color in her face.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked, and Elisa swore she heard panic in her voice.

  “I came to check on you. You’re not answering my calls. What’s going on, Penny?”

  “Nothing. You need to go.”

  “I’m not going anywhere until we talk.
I know it’s selfish, but I’m getting married in like two months. You’re my photographer, and my best friend. I need you.”

  She saw the grief flash in her friend’s eyes, and her stomach sank. “Elisa, I-I can’t do the wedding. I’m sorry. You’ll need to find someone else.”

  For a long moment, she was too stunned to speak. “What the hell do you mean you can’t do the wedding? Penny? I… What the fuck!”

  Penny winced. “I’m sorry. I’ll email you some names. I know a lot of good people.”

  “Wait!” Elisa said when Penny went to shut the door. “If you can’t shoot the wedding, at least be a bridesmaid. I can’t kick Shelley out of the top spot but you can at least be in the wedding.”

  “I won’t be there. I’m sorry. Again. It’s just the way it is.” With that, Elisa’s closest friend in the entire world shut the door in her face. And shut her out of her life.

  Chapter 11

  Elisa stood in front of the mirror as Shelley pinned her veil onto her head. The photographer she’d managed to snag at the last minute stood off to the side, discreetly taking pictures. Every snick of the camera reminded her that it was supposed to be Penny standing beside her, documenting the most important day of her life.

  Tears were ruthlessly blinked back. Her mother would never forgive her for ruining her makeup ten minutes before she walked down the aisle. But she couldn’t blink away the ache in her heart at not having her best friend by her side as she promised herself to one man for the rest of her life.

  It was suddenly more than she could bear. “I’ll be back,” she mumbled, scooping her skirts up and running for the door of the room they’d been given at the church. Before anyone could stop her, she raced out and down the hall to the room just off the sanctuary where the men were waiting.

  “Elisa? What’s wrong, baby?” Paul asked when she burst into the room.

  “I needed… Can we have a moment?” she said to his groomsmen, who were all looking at her like she’d grown three heads. With the exception of Mike, who she figured had known her long enough that nothing she did surprised him anymore. The men filed out, with Mike stopping to cup her face in his hands.